Mormon Stories #1149: Michael and Donna Showalter: Choosing Love Over Orthodoxy Pt. 2

Donna Showalter knelt on the pavement in front of her son’s car while police lights flashed behind her. She was not praying, at least not in the traditional sense. She was trying to stop Michael from accelerating toward a concrete barrier. This moment, captured in Mormon Stories episode 1149 with Michael and Donna Showalter, sits at the center of a wrenching dialogue about what happens when LDS orthodoxy collides with a child’s survival. Their story offers a stark counter-narrative to the church’s emphasis on eternal families by asking a brutal question: what good is sealing if your child is dead?

Background: The Utah Suicide Crisis and LGBtQ Mormon Youth

The Showalter narrative unfolds against a backdrop of documented crisis. Utah has consistently ranked among the highest states for youth suicide, with rates doubling between 2007 and 2017 according to state health department data. During this same period, the LDS Church intensified its rhetoric regarding same-sex relationships, culminating in the November 2015 policy that classified gay marriage as apostasy and barred children of same-sex couples from baptism until age 18.

For Donna, a believing Mormon mother, the theological stakes were cosmic. For Michael, a gay teenager growing up in Provo, the stakes were immediate and bodily. He describes depression not as sadness but as a logical void where "people don't love me" becomes an immutable fact, disconnected from external reality. The dissonance between his internal experience and his church’s teachings created a pressure cooker that erupted in multiple suicide attempts and the desperate chase that ended with Donna on the asphalt.

Key Claims: Research vs. Rejection in Mormon Families

The Showalters’ account gains weight through its intersection with peer-reviewed research. During the interview, Donna references the Family Acceptance Project at San Francisco State University, which found that LGBTQ youth experiencing high levels of family rejection are eight times more likely to attempt suicide than those in accepting environments. She describes holding her breath while reading their checklist of rejecting behaviors, terrified she had already caused irreversible harm.